Death care revolution in Australia

Written by Ingrid Laurence for Australian Seniors

Dying is big business in Australia, with the country’s death care and funeral industry worth more than $2 billion. But as two passionate entrepreneurs working in different areas of the death and dying space explain, it also takes a very special person to succeed in the industry.

In this article, two industry insiders reveal how tradition is giving way to personalisation, diversity and innovation offering new ways to honour life, say goodbye, and find meaning in the farewell.

According to Tasmanian-based end of life consultant, death doula and educator Dr Annetta Mallon, bringing cake or telling jokes is a great way to break the ice. “Most of us have a lot of laughter and love in our lives and it’s important to leaven the sorrow and grief,” she says.

Martin Tobin, who grew up in a family funeral business and is now an expert adviser on the global industry, adds: “There’s a stereotype that funeral directors are a bit weird and severe and a bit morbid, but it’s far from the truth. Most people who work in funeral services are really warm and loving and gregarious people, because you have to have those qualities to really survive and thrive in what we do in that space.”

The pair share their experiences with host James Valentine on the sixth season of the award-winning podcast from Australian Seniors, Life’s Booming: Dying to Know, talking about the work they perform to support people through the last step of life’s journey. During their discussion, they answer some of the biggest questions of their industry – read on for some of their insights.

Who is the funeral for?

Funerals are as much for the living as for the person who has died. They help loved ones process grief, come together, and begin to heal. Annetta and Martin share why these rituals matter, and how they support both individuals and communities.

Martin: “We’re finding a lot of people now trying to orchestrate their own celebration and say, this is what I want; I want this to happen, that to happen. And that’s got a place, but it’s really for the living, for those that are left behind. I think it’s really important that the funerals are done the way that the survivors feel they need to do it, so that helps them get back into life afterwards.”

Annetta: “It is to really bring us out of the immense shock of raw grief. We get to come together. We get to shift from intense grief, the personal experience of loss, into mourning, which is a more shared communal public sense of loss, which is a really important transitional period in accepting a death. And the funeral makes a space that I think is important, not just for the closest people, but for friends, work colleagues, community members.”

Related: Your guide to talking about death with your loved ones 

What’s new in funerals?

Funerals in Australia are changing. Annetta and Martin reveal how new choices  from living celebrations to highly personalised farewells are reshaping the way we say goodbye.

Annetta: “One of the big changes that I think we’re going to see more and more of in Australia now, with assisted dying nationally available, is a fabulous ‘going away party’. So, people who attend their own funerals, because basically, especially if you’re in a hospital, you know when your time is coming. So, there’s almost like a bookending effect where we have a celebration with the person and they get to say goodbyes and explain to people why they were important and hear all the good stuff.”

Related: Dying at home and proper end of life planning 

Martin: “The traditional funeral – in a church and straight to the cemetery, with everything reasonably structured – that pattern has definitely broken. We’re seeing two things in the Australian industry that are trending. Consumers are saying, that doesn’t do it for me anymore, I’m either going to go for something very simple that’s low cost and where there’s not much of a fuss; or people are saying, I want something highly customised, highly celebratory, highly innovative.”

What is a death doula?

A death doula offers guidance and support through the end-of-life journey. Annetta explains how she helps people and families prepare, plan, and find comfort during one of life’s biggest transitions.

Annetta: “A doula is someone who supports life’s transitions (birth and death). I provide an awful lot of information for people who have questions like, what is this going to feel like? Should I be at home or should I be in the hospital? I can answer questions and help people prepare their documentation and their wishes, because that’s not anything you want to be doing at the last minute.

“When I’ve done my job really right, I’m not even involved when someone dies. Often I will hear from families afterwards. And there’s wonderful stories about the time that was spent while their person was dying, caring for their person’s body after death, how the family and the friends came together to facilitate all of that. The death literacy snowball is a wonderful thing to watch in action.”

Making a living from death – is there a conflict of interest?

Is it possible to balance compassion with business in the funeral industry? Martin explains why integrity and genuine choice are key to supporting families, even when costs are involved.

Martin: “There isn’t really (a conflict of interest). Sometimes industry people are talking to a family and they’ve gone through a loss and there’s a lot of grief and pain and there might be some challenging financial circumstances too that they glean from the conversation. And people feel, oh, gee, how can we add pain to them or send them an invoice for $10,000 or whatever it might be, on top of what they’re already experiencing.

“It is a little bit uncomfortable, but I think if the business has integrity around its pricing and there’s genuine options and they’re not forced into any sort of uncomfortable decisions, then most people recognise that a funeral, if it needs to be done in a certain way, there’s going to be a cost to that.”

Related: How much does a funeral cost?

How are baby boomers revolutionising the funeral industry?

Baby boomers are driving big changes in the industry. Annetta and Martin discuss how this generation’s demand for choice, diversity, and innovation is reshaping end-of-life traditions for everyone.

Annetta: “At every stage of life, the boomer generation have demanded information and choice, and they want things on their terms far more than we’ve seen in previous generations. So, what are my rights, options and choices at the end of life? What can we do better and differently? People do want to know what’s possible. How can we offer a space for respectful memorialisation and body disposition that is not taking up valuable land?

“There are options for everybody. So, it’s opening up spaces for non-medical, community-based people like myself. It also means that there’s new and exciting ways for funeral directors to then work with people to make the meaningful, personalised, ritual and ceremony and funeral experience. So, thank you, boomers. We’ve got a lot of change.”

Martin: “I think the work that doulas are doing is getting people comfortable with the fact that we all die. The organised industry has to realise that with education and boomer-led innovation, there’s a lot more change they have to embrace, otherwise they will become irrelevant.

“Back in the early 1990s, there were very few women, very few young people, very few people from diverse backgrounds (working as funeral directors). So, it’s changed a lot for the better. There’s no stereotypical funeral director now, it’s really, really diverse,” he adds.

Tune in to hear more from Dr Annetta Mallon and Martin Tobin in Matters of Life and Death, episode 4 of the Australian Seniors podcast series Life’s Booming: Dying to Know, hosted by James Valentine.